Oh Holy Hell What Have I Done?
why do you constantly use british spellings and words its so fucking annoying when american people 'pretend to be british' just shut the fuck up
Anonymous

genderfluidmermaid:

fisto:

i really like the idea of a fantasy setting but in modern times. elves on smart phones and taking pictures for their instagram. dwarves getting into console wars and calling each other casual gamers. mages casting dangerous spells for the vine. i want it.

"Dude I dunno, necromancy is pretty fucked up." "Do it for the vine."

ibrandster:

i think of this whenever i buy anything over $10

ibrandster:

i think of this whenever i buy anything over $10

thedorito:

I’m laughing so hard the balloons in my friends house for her party set off the motion sensor alarm and the police showed up and searched the house but no one was there. we drew the dumbest faces on the balloons just imagine walking into a house thinking there’s a robber and imagehello

New favourite joke:

shineonovermyclouds:

agathaheterodyne:

where-am-i-send-help:

ougbad:

karlimeaghan:

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says ”Five beers, please.”

i dont get it

No one explain it

After the Roman drinks the beers, he tells the bartender, “I want a martinus.”

"Don’t you mean a martini?”

"If I wanted two, I would’ve asked for them."

i cant stop laughing omg

drarna:

before blaming others, think: whats the 1 constant in all your failed relationships? its that cursed egyptian amulet why do u even have that

alcblueyes:

theactualharrystyles:

“you only started liking it cause everyone else did”

well yeah

everyone was talking about it

i got curious

i watched it

and i liked it

how is that a bad thing

Thank you

trekkiee:

mcroosa:

Mommy teaching babby easier water drinking way because drinking water is hard experience u get it in your nose. Jesus how she puts her paw on his head in the second one. Such concern and love.

THIS IS THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER FUCKING SEEN FROM CATS EVER

ewebie:

perchu:

razzliox:

perchu:

what rock group has four men that don’t sing

what

mount rushmore 

get out

soaringthroughskies:

oblivi0s:

Today’s date is the same as it is backwards. 4/10/2014

so i saw this and started freaking out thinking that i’d lost six months of my life and that it was october. and then i realised this was made by an american.

jumpingjaverts:

image

you got designer shades just to hide your face and you wear them around like you’re cooler than me and you never say hey or remember my name and its probably cause you think you’re cooler than me

heyreallygiger:

if i ever met satan the first thing i would say is “did it hurt…when you fell from heaven??” It would be hilarious. The next thing I would do is probably burst into flame and get impaled dozens of times but it would still be hilarious

cherrylickers:

cigarettesandguitarstrings:

kanyewesticle:

mynationaltreasure:

toinfinityandbeyonce:

smilingemoticon:

kanyewesticle:

usb-dongle:

kanyewesticle:

it takes me like 3 days to wake up in the morning

image

oh my god

fucking fandom references

WHAT FANDOM? THE JESUS FANDOM?

THEY PREFER THE TERM CHRISTIANITY

This is the post that killed me

imageThis is the post that killed him.

IT GOT BETTER

beautiful-ordinary-things:

HE HAS A TINY CART OF CARROTS

beautiful-ordinary-things:

HE HAS A TINY CART OF CARROTS